Tag Archives: rape

Wanna help someone?

IMG_0088                                                      Planned Giving
to The Women’s Center
                                                                                    It could be in the middle of the night when a woman knocks at our door, shaking as she nervously asks for help. Makeup could not hide the blows to her face. She is without money, a safe place to stay, accompanied by the belief that she had done something wrong. She brings her daughter, as well, who wonders why the Daddy she loves always hits and swears. Perhaps there’s a telephone call to the hotline, where a volunteer hopes to convince a desperate woman that tonight is not the time to die. Or possibly someone calls from the hospital emergency room reporting a rape. Women, men, children, sexual orientation, it makes no difference.

The Women’s Center, established in 1972, continues to provide services to the surrounding counties. In 2013, we assisted 141 children and 862 adults with 11,715 hours of domestic violence services; 6,713 nights of domestic violence and 5,413 nights of transitional housing; and 16,429 meals to residents in shelter. Public education, professional training, orders of protection, and hotline calls are provided as well.

Thanks to you, we have expanded and updated our facilities. We have little debt and manage to show a respectable balance sheet. But where we struggle is raising enough money to maintain a $1.3 million dollar budget. We receive our financial support from various federal, state, and private grants, and donations from you. Government budget cuts continue while we deal with increased services. I wish you could come to ground zero and watch the dedicated work of our staff. You would soon learn that they are underpaid angels, doing God’s work.

Whether you are a first-time donor, or one that continues to offer us a lifeline, we need your help. This can be done as annual contributions, or through planned giving, a means of providing future financial support. For now, we ask you to forget the tax benefits in giving. Just think about the abused woman knocking at our door, the child who still loves her Daddy, the raped woman lying on a hospital bed, or the woman who believes that tonight is the time to die. There are so many of them.

A large number of our donors come from people of limited means, while a smaller number come from sizable estates. Contributions, whether large or small, reward the donor with the emotional satisfaction of helping someone in need. “How do I make a gift to The Women’s Center,” you might ask. Giving can be as simple as tying your shoe, or more complicated, requiring the advice from your tax consultant. Let’s say that you want to donate $25 dollars per month to The Women’s Center.   Mail a check to the Center each month, or setup a monthly deduction from your local bank or credit card. Change or terminate your contribution at your discretion. Maybe you prefer to make a lump sum donation of $5,000 to the Center. Now that was easy, and yes, you are helping the abused woman knocking at the Center’s door, the child who still loves her Daddy, the raped woman lying on a hospital bed, or the woman who believes that tonight is the time to die.

Suppose you want to do more long term giving, commonly called planned giving — any major gift made during lifetime or at death as part of a donor’s overall financial and/or estate plan. Planned gifts are comprised of the following:

1) Gifts of appreciated assets

Appreciated assets are stocks, bonds, mutual fund shares, real estate, personal tangible assets, and almost anything of value. Giving appreciated gifts can financially benefit the donor as well as the Center. Maybe you have stocks that are valued at $10,000 with a cost basis of $2,500. If you sell the stock and then give the proceeds to the Center you will have paid income tax on the profit ($7,500). Transfer ownership directly to the Center and you eliminate any personal income tax while the Center is free to sell the stock without any tax liability. Everyone benefits from such a transaction. Buy low and give high is an exciting option.

2) Gifts that return income or other financial benefit to the donor

A Pooled Income Fund is established in the Center’s name that pays a life income to you, the donor. At the donor’s death, the balance of the investment can be held or liquidated by the Center. A Life-Income gift can be any investment that allows the donor to increase their income, an immediate tax deduction, and the elimination of any capital gains tax due at the transfer of appreciated assets to the Center.

3) Gifts payable upon donor’s death

Assets that are payable as a beneficiary designation, part of a will, or living trust. Such a gift helps ensure The Women’s Center’s future viability and strength, without costing you anything during your life. Think about this, you are helping abuse victims without changing your cash flow or the balance of your net worth. Just when the Center’s cash flow seems bleak, we often receive notice that a donor chose to include the Center in their will. It feels magical, as we continue to provide our services to the community. When you make a bequest, you can modify or terminate the gift at your discretion. Target your gift to a specific need, or allow The Women’s Center to determine how best to utilize your donation. Your attorney can provide you with the appropriate language to include in your will.

Your bequest can be a stated dollar amount, or specific property to The Women’s Center. Some of our friends prefer to give a certain percentage of the remainder of their estate — the amount that remains after paying all debts, costs, and other prior legacies. Whatever your objectives, the Center will be happy to work with you in planning a gift that will be satisfying, economical, and effective in carrying our mission.

 You can name The Women’s Center as a beneficiary of your IRA, 401(k), 403(c), or other qualified plan. Simply designate The Women’s Center to receive all or a portion of your plan after your death. By doing so, you avoid the potential double taxation your retirement savings would face if you had designated the qualified plans to your heirs. You can continue to take regular lifetime withdrawals, while maintaining the flexibility to change beneficiaries if your family’s needs change during your lifetime.

Name The Women’s Center as the complete or partial beneficiary on your life insurance policy. The death benefit payable to the Center would not be subject to income or estate taxes. You have the option of transferring ownership of your life insurance policy. In doing so, you would receive an income tax deduction for the cash value of the policy. Simply contact your life insurance company and request a Change of Beneficiary/Ownership Form and designate The Women’s Center as the new owner and/or beneficiary of your policy.

There are many financial tools used when making a gift to The Women’s Center. Some donors might choose the Deferred Gift Annuity – provides lifetime annuity payments commencing at a future date.

Perhaps the Retained Life Estate might be more to your liking. You transfer the title to your residence, farm, or vacation home to The Women’s Center, and live there for the rest of your life. Continue to live in the property for life or a specified term of years while being responsible for the property taxes and upkeep. The property passes to The Women’s Center when your life estate ends.

With the Charitable Bargain Sale, you sell your residence or other property to The Women’s Center for a price below the appraised market value – a transaction that is part charitable gift and part sale. In return you receive a tax deduction for the amount of the gift, and cash for the payment made by the Center.

With thoughtful planning, The Women’s Center, you, and your loved ones, all benefit from planned giving. The donor states their financial goal for the Center, and through the assistance of the Center, your financial planner or tax consultant, a planned gift is formed.

You make it possible for us to help the abused woman knocking at our door, the child who wonders why the Daddy she loves always hits and swears, the raped woman lying on a hospital bed, or the woman who believes that tonight is the time to die.

Contact Us

We are happy to discuss your charitable plans and goals. We will see that your gift is used as you wish, to help us carry on the work of The Women’s Center.

The Women’s Center, Inc.
610 S. Thompson Street
Carbondale, IL 62901
Phone: (618) 549-4807
wced@thewomensctr.org

 

Heart of Darkness: physical & sexual abuse

 

IMG_0088

News release:

     An NFL player hurls his fist into the side of his finance’s face. Down to the floor, that’s where she fell – out cold, like a dead fish on a frozen shore.
Man wanted sex, wife refused. Man head butts wife, broke her nose, punched her in the face, and threw a shoe at his eighteen-month-old child.
Two Madison twelve-year-old girls repeatedly stabbed a twelve-year-old girl, and left her for dead. The victim has since recovered physically.
Man physically and sexually abused a young woman held hostage for nearly ten years.
Teenage male forced a five-year-old boy to perform oral sex. After ejaculation, the teenager urinates in the little boy’s mouth. Two people stood by and watched.
Each day thousands of people are sexually and physically abused; women, men, children, sexual orientation, it makes no difference.
***
Recently we have been inundated with stories of physical and sexual abuse in the National Football League. The video of a football player hitting his finance and knocking her out is dramatic, especially when played continuously over the national airwaves. People are alarmed, shocked, hoping for justice, but as several moons pass, the outrage will pass as well. Abuse is not a new phenomenon. You see, this is not about the NFL, this is about our nation, and how we deal with the epidemic – physical and sexual abuse.
In the heart of darkness, that’s where victims reside, possibly for the rest of their lives. It’s not that they don’t recover, they often do, but the memories can surface at the hint of days gone by. In quiet moments, I sometimes recall memories of abuse that make me angry, followed by a tear or two.
Behavior is controlled by an individual’s concept of reality, and when viewed collectively, define who we are as a nation. Reality is built on our genetic makeup and life’s experiences — nature and nurture. Developmental biology tells us that we are a combination of the two. Nature tattoos us with a genetic makeup – DNA – while nurture is a product of what we see, hear, smell, and touch, and the countless life experiences that mold our core. From the beginning, we are organisms with a genetic blueprint that continually interacts with our environment causing change to occur as we move from conception, to childhood, to adulthood, and finally to death.
You can’t know what you don’t know, that’s what my therapist said one day. She continually challenges me to be more insightful rather than riding the waves on my imaginary surfboard. I now understand that when we reach adulthood, we are programmed to function within our perceived reality. What we perceive as right and wrong, is not necessarily right and wrong.
Science tells us the same. The brain has over one-hundred-billion nerve cells called neurons. When information is transferred from one neuron to another, the gap between neurons are filled by chemical substances called neurotransmitters, which fire across the space, sending signals to other neurons. At times, brain activity might resemble a well-lit midway at a county fair with hundreds of rides and booths operating simultaneously. Trauma alters the neurons in our brain, affecting our behavior, our reality.
A child’s reality is like putty and can be reshaped by exposure to good role models and positive experiences. But repeated abuse turns their reality into hardened putty found in a winter storm; more difficult to mold, but still possible. Daily contact with compassionate teachers who provide attention, supervised interaction between children, role models of appropriate behavior, consistent rules and discipline offer hope for the damage child. How many of us can recall a teacher or two who changed their life? There is a national movement to reach younger children through pre-kindergarten, head start, and the like. Although the teacher’s plate is full, I would like to see citizenship, character building classes, and logic to taught as children move through elementary and secondary education.
For adult victims who self-medicate through drugs and alcohol, there is hope. Community and county mental health organizations, private therapists and psychiatrists offer therapy and medication that, in time, can alter the wiring in our damaged minds. My favorite organization, The Women’s Center, located in Carbondale, Illinois, and established in 1972, continues to offer food, shelter, and counseling for children, women, and men whose lives have been shattered by violence. Through my years as a member of the Board of Directors, I have witnessed the work that goes on at ground zero. Since their beginning, the Center, has saved thousands of abuse victims.
In the Heart of Darkness, the place where victims reside, light is as rare as the eye of a tornado. But doors are there waiting to be opened. A better tomorrow is there for the taking.
***
Please checkout The Women’s Center. If you are so moved, we welcome financial support and those who choose to donate their time.

http://www.thewomensctr.org/

 

A worthy cause, my favorite, I might add.

IMG_0088I’ve been a board member of the Women’s Center for several years.   I was recently asked to write a fund raising letter for the organization.  Hopefully this will move you to consider the Women’s Center to be worthy of your support.
***

Dear Women’s Center supporter:
Imagine what it’s like to be a bird without wings, Who’s fallen into a hole and not allowed to sing. Imagine what it’s like to be a beautiful whale, With no place to swim but a five-gallon pale.    …male survivor of childhood sexual abuse

It could be in the middle of the night when a woman knocks at our door, shaking as she nervously asks for help. The makeup could not hide the blows to her face. She is without money, a safe place to stay, accompanied by the belief that she had done something wrong. She brings her daughter, as well, who wonders why the Daddy she loves always hits and swears. Perhaps there’s a telephone call to the hotline, where a volunteer hopes to convince a desperate woman that tonight is not the time to die. Or possibly someone calls from the hospital emergency room reporting a rape. Women, men, children, sexual orientation, it makes no difference.

The Women’s Center, established in 1972, continues to provide services to the surrounding counties. In 2013, we assisted 141 children and 862 adults with 11,715 hours of domestic violence services; 6,713 nights of domestic violence and 5,413 nights of transitional housing; and 16,429 meals to residents in shelter. Public edu- cation, professional training, orders of protection, and hotline calls are provided as well.

Thanks to you, we have expanded and updated our facilities. We have little debt and manage to show a respectable balance sheet. But where we struggle is raising enough money to maintain a $1.3 million dollar budget. We receive our financial support from various federal, state, and private grants, and donations from you. We face an annual increase in services while governmental budget cuts leave us with less. I wish you could come to ground zero and watch the dedicated work of our staff. You would soon learn that they are underpaid angels, doing God’s work.

Whether you are a first-time donor, or one that continues to offer us a lifeline, we need your help. This can be done as annual contributions, or through planned giving, a means of providing future financial support with no upfront cost. For now, we ask you to forget the tax benefits in giving. Just think about the abused woman knocking at our door, the child who still loves her Daddy, the raped woman lying on a hospital bed, or the woman who believes that tonight is the time to die. There are so many of them.

Sincerely,

Larry L. Franklin

Board Member
Development Committee Member